It is currently Mon May 29, 2017 6:18 am



Reply to topic  [ 17 posts ] 
Dating~ 
Author Message
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:13 am
Posts: 1142
Location: Canada
Much of youth is out in the world dating one another, how do you feel about it? Do you think there is a certain age at which dating is too young, or should youth not focus on dating what so ever? Why do you feel that way?

_________________
Image
Image
Auction Buying Shop Wishlist Signatures & Animations Journal


Thu Aug 01, 2013 12:08 am
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Aug 19, 2010 7:19 pm
Posts: 3084
I would say below 13 is too young. Maybe even a little older. Other than that, it doesn't bother me.

_________________
()()
(o.0)
(")(")

Creyn

() ()
(0.o)
(")(")


Thu Aug 01, 2013 5:00 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2013 8:37 pm
Posts: 309
Location: saratov, russia
It makes me uncomfortable seeing 12 or 13 year olds dating. I feel as if they're dating for the wrong reasons, to conform to society (having a lover makes them feel accepted) or because the other person is extremely attractive (one would be proud walking by his side because he's "hot", despite whether or not he's a jerk). I remember almost everyone in middle school would have a boyfriend or girlfriend mostly because of one of the two reasons, resulting in a one week relationship. Maybe two weeks if you're lucky.

Again I'm not saying all of young people are doing this, you could find an amazing partner at a young age. These are just my views on the majority of young teens from what I've seen.

I don't think they need to focus on dating. Focus on studies and your future. You'll find someone special in time. You probably won't find the right person if you're desperate and constantly looking for a girl/boyfriend.

_________________
ImageImage
Image

[ happy holidays ]
______w!sh


Thu Aug 01, 2013 9:22 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:13 am
Posts: 1142
Location: Canada
Veaf wrote:
It makes me uncomfortable seeing 12 or 13 year olds dating. I feel as if they're dating for the wrong reasons, to conform to society (having a lover makes them feel accepted) or because the other person is extremely attractive (one would be proud walking by his side because he's "hot", despite whether or not he's a jerk). I remember almost everyone in middle school would have a boyfriend or girlfriend mostly because of one of the two reasons, resulting in a one week relationship. Maybe two weeks if you're lucky.

Again I'm not saying all of young people are doing this, you could find an amazing partner at a young age. These are just my views on the majority of young teens from what I've seen.

I don't think they need to focus on dating. Focus on studies and your future. You'll find someone special in time. You probably won't find the right person if you're desperate and constantly looking for a girl/boyfriend.


I completely agree. I'm in high school right now and this is a very common thing that I have seen. It's much better than elementary school, but the relationships (if we can ever call them that) last up to a month or two at most..and the thing that bothers me personally is seeing all these people posting on social media platforms of how unhappy they are, despite the fact they had known that person for less that two months. If they like to date people every single week, they can do it all they want but nobody should be hearing about their 56 breakups in one year. I feel like many teenagers are not mature enough to even understand what a relationship is and with the whole society fitting in and what not they try to have that but they simply aren't ready for it. And by the time they learn from that, it's the end of school and their grades aren't the brightest. It's a bit sad in my opinion.

_________________
Image
Image
Auction Buying Shop Wishlist Signatures & Animations Journal


Thu Aug 01, 2013 10:25 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Mar 25, 2011 6:57 pm
Posts: 3042
Having a 12, 13, or a 14 year old person dating is too young in my opinion. I highly doubt that kids will take dating seriously because they don't have the social skills to do so. They are in the stage where they are starting to figure out themselves. Plus, they aren't very good at communicating and understanding their opposite sex.

Veaf wrote:
It makes me uncomfortable seeing 12 or 13 year olds dating. I feel as if they're dating for the wrong reasons, to conform to society (having a lover makes them feel accepted) or because the other person is extremely attractive (one would be proud walking by his side because he's "hot", despite whether or not he's a jerk). I remember almost everyone in middle school would have a boyfriend or girlfriend mostly because of one of the two reasons, resulting in a one week relationship. Maybe two weeks if you're lucky.

Again I'm not saying all of young people are doing this, you could find an amazing partner at a young age. These are just my views on the majority of young teens from what I've seen.

I don't think they need to focus on dating. Focus on studies and your future. You'll find someone special in time. You probably won't find the right person if you're desperate and constantly looking for a girl/boyfriend.


I agree with this statement. I feel like younger kids are dating for conformity. I feel like society sending a message to the younger kids that in order to be happy, you need to have a boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever. Most of the children's movies and stories revolve 2 people falling in love especially for anything with disney princesses. (The disney princess I can think of that is not in a romantic relationship is Merida from Brave.) Not to mention, movies tend to distort relationships and make them too idealistic.

But it also depends on one's maturity. You can say 16 year old is a general rule for the time to start dating, but some people don't act mature for their age. Some kids don't want to be committed to a relationship (let alone to deal all the drama with dating). Or they have other things/problems they have to deal with and dating would drain their energy and their sanity. Kids are already busy with school, work, and/or sports. For some kids, their lives are too busy for a relationship.

_________________
Image
Image Spread the love of berries! <(-⌒_⌒-)>

The Warp Star shop!
Buying: A lot of Sunstones Auction: Nothing Kickass: A Revolution Wishlist

Image

Image

MI time: 12:07 at Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday.


Thu Aug 01, 2013 10:49 pm
Profile WWW
Member
User avatar

Joined: Tue May 14, 2013 7:33 am
Posts: 330
I would say that 16 is a good age to start dating, but then again seeing how every 16 year old dates someone for a week and then moves on to someone else... I think they still might be too young, at least where I live.
I don't see much teenagers with a healthy lasting relationship anymore nowadays, it's as if they just want some achievemend of "Most dated in one year"

_________________

Journal x Buying x Giveaway x FB Page

Image


Fri Aug 02, 2013 2:44 am
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Aug 24, 2011 8:00 pm
Posts: 2759
I think dating is pointless but that's just my opinion because it has nothing to offer me, restricts my freedom and I have to consider the other persons feelings when making decisions- it's a burden.

As for ages, I think people who are like, under 18 shouldn't date. Why are stupid kids dating at 12 anyway? Go play video games or something.

anyway, to each their own.

_________________
Image
shop * (it's a laboratory).
Sporadic appearances. | | hanbei is da best
Image


Fri Aug 02, 2013 7:38 am
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2010 10:05 pm
Posts: 871
Location: Orange City, IA
Dating's a tough issue to discuss because the experience is different for every person. I think that there is a certain age where dating shouldn't be allowed (such as below 12 years of age) but honestly, if two people really do care for each other and want to spend time together, they should be able to date, even if it's somewhat superficial.

That's not to say that sometimes I feel uncomfortable seeing couples as young as 12 or 13, but it really isn't my business. Dating is different for all people of all different walks of life and everyone should be able to experience it when they feel they are ready.

_________________
Image
ShopBuyingBreeding
Image


Fri Aug 02, 2013 7:24 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Dec 03, 2010 11:39 pm
Posts: 11900
Location: Okinawa, Japan
I've never been on a date (despite my mother's objections)

I'm not opposed to dating, but it just doesn't happen. People that I like usually move to a different state or I move or... yeah.
At first, there was an issue of money. I didn't have any until I got a job in my last year of high school. (and I didn't like anyone there) but now (actually I'm still poor) I would consider it. Just hasn't happened yet.

I did have a crush not too long ago, but they lost interest in me when they found an even cuter (he is totally ultra cute) korean to converse with. Another friend really likes e but lives a few hundred miles away and we are both poor. T^T so no drives or flying.

I would say that if you can pay for a date/ get there, then there really isn't a problem. I mean...the location is important. no shady places like a bad beighborhood's park at night >_> but still...yeah

_________________
Image
ImageImageImageImageImageImageImage
ImageImage
Image


Sat Aug 03, 2013 8:07 pm
Profile WWW
Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Nov 04, 2009 11:00 pm
Posts: 1596
Location: rannoch
idk, i started dating my first boyfriend when we were 12 and we were together for ten years. i guess it just depends on the person. i don't like to judge others for dating young bc i've been there and things worked out for me. if you have the proper mindset for a relationship i don't think your age matters as much as your expectations.

idk "dating" as a word feels really casual to me, like you'd say that if you were going out with a person just to see how things turn out, but the relationship isn't very serious yet. but dating doesn't really entail anything specific either. like if you hold hands with a person and hang out with them all the time and you wanna say you're dating then go ahead. that's just as valid as a dating couple who does more intimate things. if you have a problem with kids having sex/not being safe or whatever then that's entirely separate from the concept of dating so overall i don't see the harm in starting the latter early. not standing alone at any rate

_________________
Image
tumblr: nuka-grape | kik: sugarybears
Image snapchat: sugarybear Image

miss u xo


Thu Aug 08, 2013 6:30 pm
Profile WWW
Member
User avatar

Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2011 9:06 am
Posts: 1300
I think it also depends on the crowd + peers. In high school, people started dating around 11-12 and quite a few of them were responsible and reliable, but peer pressure is tough, and the vast majority of my classmates ended up losing their virginity and recycling bf/gfs, so :o it was pretty much, if you don't have a bf/gf you were socially inept and an outcast freak. I and most of my year, (at first) found it all ~scandalous because for them, 'omg wat a lady of disagreeable virtue dat biatch'/'woah you da man, dawg!'; and for me, I was terrified of the concept of being close to someone when I had no idea who I was, and was super awkward because who isn't at that age? But then people just accepted it as the norm, and well, you better be dating, or we get to bully you! -.-;;

also a classmate of mine had a pretty scandalous experience (a really sad one too, but I won't elaborate unless people want the sordid details)

On the other hand, my brother ended up 'dating' a girl when he was 13, but it wasn't really what you'd call dating (at least when I was in HS) more like, "oh she's my gf" - they never went on dates or anything, I felt like he was pressured by his friends to have a gf so he just picked a girl and voila lol it was like a total 180 from my year

Personally, because of all of this, I'd say 16-18 is a good age to start, but it really depends on meeting the right kind of person. Nowadays a lot of people take 'dating' to mean 'a way to lose my virginity/become popular' when it's not that at all :/

but yeah, my HS experience isn't to account for the world, so take it with a grain of salt. I'd say if it felt right, then go ahead but please not for the wrong reasons!! and if something feels wrong and if you feel scared, then don't. I mean, you have the rest of your life to find someone out there, why rush it in high school and when you're so young?

wow long post was long, lolll

_________________
Image
ImageImage
oh, should my people fall in ..........
surely i'll do the same................
confined in mountain halls...........
we got too close to the flame
.....
auction || buying || breeding || journal || giveaway
twitter || tumblr
remember me...
fc: 0877-1517-7417....................

Image


Fri Aug 09, 2013 1:46 pm
Profile
Member

Joined: Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:36 pm
Posts: 272
Veaf wrote:
It makes me uncomfortable seeing 12 or 13 year olds dating. I feel as if they're dating for the wrong reasons, to conform to society (having a lover makes them feel accepted) or because the other person is extremely attractive (one would be proud walking by his side because he's "hot", despite whether or not he's a jerk). I remember almost everyone in middle school would have a boyfriend or girlfriend mostly because of one of the two reasons, resulting in a one week relationship. Maybe two weeks if you're lucky.

Again I'm not saying all of young people are doing this, you could find an amazing partner at a young age. These are just my views on the majority of young teens from what I've seen.

I don't think they need to focus on dating. Focus on studies and your future. You'll find someone special in time. You probably won't find the right person if you're desperate and constantly looking for a girl/boyfriend.


I got 3 days.
UP HIGH.

_________________
Image

I collect ponies. I then set them on fire. We all need our fix.


Sat Sep 14, 2013 7:20 am
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 30, 2013 11:07 pm
Posts: 27
I'd say that anything lower than 15 would be bad, I dunno. I'm 13 myself, and I feel really weird around my friends who are dating. It just doesn't seem right to date at such an early age. 15 and above seems appropriate.

_________________
Image Image

http://tpmrpg.net/signup.php?s=712904


Tue Nov 05, 2013 10:36 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 10, 2013 1:06 am
Posts: 40
As i was once young, i experienced young dating. I was 11+ (cant really remember) at the time.
I'd keep it for 14+ of age.
It's good that kids are experiencing the feelings, it's just that they may be just confused.
The kids may over valuate their young love, and get tragically heart broken when their relationship grows distant as they age. which could lead to unnecessary thoughts and/or actions.

_________________
Image Image

"When you're down in the mouth, and life's a pain
weatherman says 'heavy rain'
A little boost is all you need
Average Joe to Hercules
A Stronger Arm, A Sharper Brain
That's Why The Future Is Fontaine!"


Sat Nov 09, 2013 2:38 am
Profile
Manly Princess
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:00 am
Posts: 7869
Location: Thailand
I'd say 12-13 would be the age you'd start (younger than that is iffy) but honestly it's up to you. I feel like in order to seriously date someone you need: a) a good understanding about yourself/what you want and/or b) a good understanding about the relationship and what you want to do with it. Which is not the case with most younger couples. A lot of people date because they just don't want to be alone, but quite a few do it because they feel like dating will fix their life problems and make them happier. It can, but chances are it won't. I feel super cynical hahaha orz

I think it's a good thing to start when you're 14-16. Experience is important, even if ultimately nothing really happens. I never got the chance to do it due to the fact that my mother was actively crippling my self-esteem and I felt like I really missed out. Now that I'm in college, everyone else has "been there, done that" meanwhile I'm like "??? IDK WHAT DO" not just regarding romantic relationships but just. People. It feels like I'm doing the high school thing in university... So yeah, my two cents based on my experiences.

Parents will be a big influence here. Caution is good, especially younger, but I think it's most important for a parent to be supportive regardless of what you choose. Forbidding someone against dating honestly either makes them rebel or emotionally/socially crippled and it doesn't help in the future when you'll inevitably be exposed to it when you're older.

_________________
Image
art by yoshimitsu

[monthly parcel giveaway]
[shop] [buying] [journal] [natures] [wishlist]

Image
Image

Please PM me for urgent matters.


Sat Nov 09, 2013 5:05 am
Profile WWW
Member
User avatar

Joined: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:05 am
Posts: 170
      Based on my short-lived experiences on online dating, it's safe to say it's okay to date so long as: one, you're aware of what you want from your partner; two, you're aware of what your partner wants; and three, you know how to communicate with your partner in a healthy manner. Big emphasis on three because God knows how many relationships ended because of how many secrets or burdens someone's keeping from their significant other or didn't listen/respect their partner, etc. all because two people could not communicate with each other properly. (Twelve-year-old me did not know this at all and had a terrible online relationship that ended within a month or so because he was offline most of the time and we never really talked.)

      Dating doesn't have to be serious when you're younger though. Example: every rumor you've heard about some kid breaking up with another kid in elementary school and middle school. Sure kids will be heartbroken about it, but they move on and learn something from their momentary trysts. They build up knowledge and experience about dating from that relationship. Whether they date for reputation, or experimentation, or even for the simple reason of love is no one else's business.

      So yeah, date whenever the hell you want, just be smart and mature about it.

_________________
What signature? Oh yeah. Stuff.
Image


Sat Nov 16, 2013 10:04 pm
Profile
Member
User avatar

Joined: Thu Nov 25, 2010 12:17 pm
Posts: 1563
Location: Germany
Because someone mentioned elementary school somewhere, those "childhood relationships" are (or were when I was that age) a completely different thing, even though some might have called it "dating" because that's what the older siblings etc did. I had such a friend in play school/kindergarten, we spent all our time together and of course were certain we would get married when we were older. Children with no ideas what they are talking about, so that is okay for me.
But when I see those little (really meaning their size because I have NO idea how old they are) boys and girls, the girls with makeup, both dressed up in "cool" clothes, with smartphones, taking about their relationship and about those of their friends, I really wonder if they've got hit in the head.
With 12 you should be old enough to KNOW about relationships. That they are not "for fun". But I have a feeling that for them, having a boyfriend/girlfriend is the same as having an iphone or something like that.
I had my first real crush when I was 13 I think. Looking back at that and everything afterwards, I learned how unimportant that first crush was. The cool kids had relationships, of course, and maybe it would have been nice to have someone to cuddle with, but on the other hand I think.. Would having such insignificant relationships lead you to have more of them because you thought that was all there was to it? Or would you still get to a point where you notice that THAT isn't what you want for your whole life?
And when I then look at how "mature" those 12 year olds think they are, I am afraid that they wouldn't just cuddle and trade shy kisses. And then I really think they shouldn't date at all.

It's late, I should be in bed, so I don't even know if I make any sense.
If they are best friends and cuddle buddies, I don't care if they call it dating. But if they talk about it like they are completely aware of what a relationship means. No. Depends. 15, so there is time for that one relationship you will look back at and think "god was I young and stupid". Otherwise.. whenever your country thinks you are old enough to drink (ha, take that america). Because hey, if you are not deemed responsible enough to drink aka know what it good for you and what isn't, why would you know it on an emotional level.

But don't mind me. Really going to bed now.

_________________
If Agility had been easy, they would have called it Obedience
ImageImage
My Journal Thread


Sat Nov 30, 2013 7:06 pm
Profile
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Reply to topic   [ 17 posts ] 

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
Designed by ST Software for PTF.